Is it Time to Cancel Cancel Culture?

Is it Time to Cancel Cancel Culture?

The term is getting a lot of airtime lately, but there’s nothing new about calling someone out. In the 1800s, it was widely used to challenge someone to a fight—and though the weapon du jour is more likely to be a pithy tweet than a duelling sword, it sometimes feels like the meaning hasn’t changed all that much.

The desired effect of calling out problematic behaviour is for the target to consider their actions, come to the conclusion that they were in the wrong, and mend their ways. But the reality is that cancellation, shame, and despair are not building blocks for a stable, equitable future; their prevalence may even be undermining efforts to build community and foster sustainable change. And that’s something that should concern anyone working toward equity or social cohesion.

Loretta J. Ross, a leading voice in the reproductive justice and anti-racism movements in the US, has been tackling the question of how to connect with others across ideological divides for decades. Her answer to calling people out? Calling them in instead.

Working with Reverend C.T. Vivian, cofounder of the Center for Democratic Renewal (then the National Anti-Klan Network), Ross found herself faced with a need for a skill she lacked: what she now calls radical empathy. She recalls that Vivian used to tell her that if you ask people to give up hate, you need to be there for them when they do. “When he first told me those words,” she said in a 2021 interview with NPR, “I did not believe him. Because if the Klan was OK hating me, I was all right hating them back.”

But public shaming, finger-pointing, and placing blame, whether online or in real life, guarantee one thing: you invite those with opposing views to a fight instead of to a conversation. But when your approach is rooted instead in respect and radical empathy, that dynamic is turned on its head. And a conversation is far more likely to achieve your goal—whether that goal is tolerance, understanding, or an acknowledgement of our shared humanity—than a fight is. Ross now acknowledges that her mentor was right—and that coming to this realisation changed her life.

In actively monitoring hate groups, including attending Ku Klux Klan rallies, Ross grew in her understanding of how ordinary people slip into extremism. Witnessing firsthand how hate spreads and is sustained through isolation, fear, and rigid identities, and examining her own thoughts, behaviours and responses, her perspective shifted. Speaking of her time teaching anti-racism classes to the wives and mothers of Klans members, Ross said, “I found that once I got to know them, I couldn't hate them anymore... And so I had to find another motivation, and that motivation became love and respect.”

Ross began rethinking how justice work should be approached. The result is her “calling-in” framework, which offers an alternative to calling people out, and a path forward that is grounded in connection, accountability, and hope over cancellation, shame, and despair. It is a toolkit for starting productive conversations, with strategies to help challenge wrongdoing while still creating space for growth, forgiveness, and community. The goal of calling someone in is not to humiliate them, but nor is it to let harmful actions, beliefs, or behaviours slide. Instead, the aim is to hold a person accountable while preserving their dignity and humanity.

For nonprofits and the social impact sector, Ross’s work carries strategic as well as moral weight: building sustainable movements, retaining staff as well as allies, maintaining credibility, cultivating reflective leadership, and navigating conflict are all supported through the application of the concepts in the framework.

While not without its limits—Ross herself acknowledges that calling out has its place, as seen in the history of the human rights movement—Ross’s ideas offer a compelling alternative to the polarising discourse that often seems to dominate. For those of us working in a sector that is under mounting pressure, the need to find ways to lead with moral clarity, courage, and care is paramount. The work of Loretta J. Ross offers us a way to lean into empathy and reimagine our role as agents of justice and transformation.

Loretta J. Ross is an acclaimed activist, educator, and visionary whose work on reproductive justice, anti-racism, and “calling in” offers a radical and compassionate reimagining of leadership. With decades of experience in social justice movements, she brings historical depth, moral grounding, and deep inspiration to the opening keynote at the International Fundraising Congress this 14-17 October in the Netherlands. Limited in-person tickets are still available and registration for the online track, which includes the opening and closing keynotes, is free of charge.

Visit this link for registration and to learn more, and use this promo code to receive a £75 discount on the ticket price - exclusive to Cii members.