My Journey to Inclusive Leadership; A Retrospective

On the turbulent ride that has been my life as a young woman of color, educated and privileged in my own right, the fight for an inclusive society has often felt like a burden heavy on my conscious. I’ve learned, because I simply had to learn, that to achieve any level of genuine inclusion it has been on me to nurture, foster and grow a culture of understanding and openness that would allow for it.

It’s been ingrained in many of us; avoid straight facts and hard truths of our own reality, soften explanations about culture, character or ability with simple universal parallels. A perpetual smiling disposition the only real defence to counteract inherent social instincts that drive people to seek comfort in the know and recognize trust and in their own tribe first.

I, like many others, hold not too much resentment for this, though. In fact, I’m sure we’re all game to make that effort to fit in with the tribes and societies we see ourselves living and working in. It is simply a truth of life that we are predisposed to have a natural inclination to only hear the voices of those who are most familiar to us.

Cultural and societal evolution is perhaps the core of adapting to an inclusive civilization wherein the pressure to conform and the psychological biases we all hold are tested against the realities of working in a complex ecosystem where our innate disposition to co-operate towards the achievement of mutual goals. In this article I will share with you two reflective snapshots that encompasses my colleagues and I’s experience with supposed and actual ‘inclusive leaders’ and the lessons I learned on the way.

(For the purpose of this article all snapshots are written in the first person)

The Smoke and Mirrors of Allyship

A simple Google search on Inclusive Leadership will get you a crisp definition which will encapsulate a seemingly lofty and fashionable style of management leadership. To be exact; ‘Inclusive leadership is a leadership style that respects and values the uniqueness of each person in a diverse group of people It is a critical capability to leverage diverse thinking in a workforce with increasingly diverse markets, customers, and talent. Inclusive leadership rules out discrimination, bias and favour based on colour, race and other protected characteristics.’

Goodness, but it can and does go on with more pie in the sky dreams of the idealised, most authentic and empathetic leaders. A world with no prejudice and outright discrimination is hard fought against. It’s been my experience that most workplaces are professional, and are delicately maintained ecosystems where anything too overtly prejudiced is strongly discouraged.

There are still those mutual goals to achieve, remember? The delicate social balance is maintained for the sake of progress towards those goals.

No, the real problem is more insidious and hidden beneath layers of deceptive self-doubt that has you second guessing your own mind. This first snapshot is an example about how the ideal diverse Workplace, a powerhouse within the industry and a shining example of inclusive leadership, does not survive on inclusivity projected as ‘Allyship’.

Companies, brands, institutions (both public and private) worldwide are hustling to become an ‘Ally’ because the act of allyship itself has two dual purposes; to avoid claims of discrimination or with the expectation of winning social recognition and acceptance. This first snapshot is a reflection on how I learned the hard way that I don’t need my company and leaders to be my Ally, but a guiding leader towards a mutually beneficial future.

‘Inclusion without power or leadership is tokenism.’ Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha (Care Work: Dreaming Disability Justice)

Reflecting on this first snapshot, I too was hesitant to point towards anything in particular. I was given responsibility; I was trusted with projects and my work was highly valued by both my team members and our clients. It was small things; being requested to stand in for photo ops on projects I hadn’t worked on, odd requests where my brown hands were the ones requested for promotional reels of journals we’d published, even if it disrupted my work days and wasn’t in my job description, being pulled into meetings-unprepared- with high level clients at the last minute if they had a person of color as their primary. Yes, small things that aren’t small at all. But I was a valued team member, I contributed in more important ways to the actual work, so why sweat the small stuff?

I was rewarded for my quiet acquiescence with more high-level responsibilities, more client facing. Years in this role, I took these as challenges to prove myself and as I gained more faith from clients and got to lead bigger projects at their request, and in the midst of this my white male counterpart received a promotion that I had been promised as I held more responsibilities and made a bigger contribution towards achieving those oh-so-important mutual goals.

Trying to follow up with management got me hit with legalese about our companies’ policies regarding seniority and distribution and the subtle implication that I should be grateful to be given the opportunities that I had at such a young age. I take this in, ask for what parameters they would need to give me a senior position, and spend those next few months working towards that. I also begin to quietly but firmly refuse to be exploited as a diversity token. I hit the parameters they made, and once again I am told I have not met their expectations despite having achieved all that their own company policy would state is more than enough.

To wit, becoming a diversity token was a trap of my own making, but it is for this reason that any company or client I worked with moving forward I did my due diligence on. Similarly, with how a ‘diverse’ team can create the illusion of inclusion, Allyship is but a heartwarming symbolic concept. A Great Photo-Op, but with no real power behind it.

In the end, years after I had moved on from this company, it all came out in a way I’m sure they were not expecting; with those very same high level BIPOC clients discovering through some disgruntled new hires and the high turnover with BIPOC employees. Clients who had become friends and colleagues approached me with surprise as the situation unfolded. They are still successfully in operation, but they lost trust, integrity and valuable talent simply because they approached inclusivity as a veneer for diversity.

The Inclusive Leader- A Standard of Trust

Authentic leaders are not hard to come by, as much as it may seem like I think they are as elusive as Big Foot. I’ve had fantastic mentors and leaders who carefully curated an environment of diverse representation, equitable opportunities, and established responsive policies that allowed for open communication, engagement and built a foundation of trust that I believe in to this day.

For me, in this second reflection snapshot, my experience with an inclusive leader began even before I applied for the role. There is something magnetic in the aura of an Inclusive Leader, and this is what first drew me to my very first mentor, now trusted friend. I met them at a conference where we both worked as facilitators and speakers for the private and public sector, respectively. In the chaos of those days, I watched as this leader gave a voice to those hesitant to speak, listened attentively and retained even the minutest of details that later established trust with our focus groups and workshops.

After the conference was concluded, and I accepted the job the leader proffered to me, I began working mor closely with their team. From this one man, heretofore Mr. K, I learned that leading a global and diverse team full of strong personalities is a labor of diligence, perseverance and attention to detail. We were an eclectic bunch, from a wide range of backgrounds, all come together to do something important that would change the economic landscape of our country.

Mr. K did not discriminate by age or educational background, distributing responsibilities and tasks to those he found capable. He would challenge us to meet our potential, all while providing a supportive wall of assurance. I knew inherently that Mr. K had my back and his trust in me was well founded, because he made it a point to say this often. In situations where I was pitted against outside forces who might have sought to question my decisions because of my young age, I was confident to face those forces because of that very trust he had in me.

I wanted to do my job well, not only because it was so important, but I did due diligence on every task given to me because there was no way I was going to let Mr. K and the team down. When we first started the team, itself was a hodgepodge of loudmouths, introverts, melancholic creatives, and sensible intelligent swots who lived and died by structure and policy.

It was Mr. K that made that team what it was, that built a foundation of trust which allowed clashing personalities to work so well together. He led us with empathy and understanding, fostering this culture within us so well that we took what he taught us and took it further by establishing our own dynamics, boundaries and sub-culture that was wholly unique to us. We achieved our goals and milestones ahead of deadlines, project co-operation was efficient and effective, and we essentially ran like a well-oiled machine.

From the outset, none of us could have predicted how well that team would work together. There were too many inherent prejudices, unconscious biases and a world of differences that were all at play. Mr. K’s trust built the foundation and his guidance was what got us to where we needed to be.

When we did clash or misunderstandings would begin to take form and spiral, Mr. K’s open and engaged leadership style is what helped us navigate those troubled waters.

As I’ve said, there is no ideal standard for which to hold a leader to, as that would be both unfair and impossible. But. Yes. There are those individuals who are simply just good leaders, and we can analyse these individuals to death under a microscope trying to craft the perfect How-To-Leader manual. Indeed, you can even be taught to be a good leader but what I learned from this particular reflective snapshot is that leadership of an effective team has its foundations in trust and faith that your leader will do right by you.

Conclusion- My Pledge to Become an Inclusive Leader

Moving forward, as I secured senior positions and eventually began to lead my own teams, these lessons stayed with me. I learned that a leader adapts to their team, listens to them, and that no voice or whatever it is that voice is saying is ever beyond your attention as a true leader.

I make an effort to understand my team and what makes them, and I hope to guide them forward with purpose.

I don’t pretend to be the leadership standard for inclusive leadership, as I’m sure there is no such thing. I simply make the choice to show up for my team each day, to hear the various voices within the team from the most boisterously outspoken to that of those softer and more hesitant. In every team I have been on and had the opportunity to lead, the lessons I learned about making mindful, purposeful leadership decisions have stayed with me.

I don’t only want to do this for my clients and teams, but my hope is to foster a universal culture of workplace inclusivity directed by leaders who understand the true meaning and purpose of being Inclusive Leaders. To cement any real change within a culture as the one described in the first Reflective Snapshot would require a deep dive into existing operational policies, benefits and privileges. Not to mention a substantial commitment towards bias training, anti-discriminatory education, and reaffirming a companywide pledge towards inclusivity.

It'll be a long road ahead, but I have full trust in Mantra Strategy’s team of leaders who encapsulate perfectly what it means to show up for your people, hear them, guide them and lead them with purpose. There is no subterfuge that I’ve found (and I think you know at this point I do my due diligence!) in their claims to be an ally for inclusivity-claims they back up with actions every time as they work persistently to foster a better and more inclusive culture in Ireland’s Non-profit/Public and Corporate sectors.

To find out more about Mantra’s Strategy, Ireland’s Impact Creation Consultancy visit www.mantrastrategy.ie